Lost...

Why do I suddenly feel so lost?
It's like I have nowhere to go anymore, no one to be with.
What went wrong?
I feel like a fool, walking around by myself, while everyone else just looks on.
Where did everyone go?
Did I just wake up today to find that everyone else moved one step forward, leaving me behind?

You can tell me I'm not alone, but that's how I feel.
I guess I'm back at square one.

- Why do I keep on doing this? Why do I keep on searching the crowd, wondering where you are? Why do I tell myself that it's done and over with? Is that true? I definitely don't feel the same as I did before, but could I be looking for something more? I'm in the point of my life where apathy threatens to step in, and that affects everything. I don't know what I'm doing anymore, I've lost my sense of direction. Lord, please, lead me back to the right way.

- Paranoia. Sometimes, it bothers me when I read your words. Idk why, but I keep on thinking you're talking about me. I don't want to lose our friendship. And even though I know, sometimes, I can be just too much, please remember, it's only because I care. Now that I think about it, you're pretty much the only one I have that's worth it. Please stay, don't go. Because if you do, then I don't know what to do. I'm sorry if I've done anything wrong. Sorry.

I don't understand myself. I don't understand how I can put everything just to make sure someone else is happy, yet I do not know how to make myself happy. I've helped solved one too many problems, yet I can't solve my own. I shower my love to those I care for, yet I myself can't find the same. I give my all, yet I barely get anything back. So why is it I can't stop everything, and figure out something for myself? Is this what my purpose in life is, to make other people happy? If so, who's purpose is it to make me happy? I told him, that he shouldn't love anyone more than himself. I told her, that she should learn from her mistakes. I told him, that he shouldn't hope for something that he knows would hurt him anyways. So why, why do I not listen to my own words?